5 Things We Learned From The Prem After Matchweek 1

Saturday mornings used to be the most enjoyable part of my week.

Now, I feel like I’m watching my ex-girlfriend. She’s moved on with her life. She hangs with a completely different crowd now. And to be honest, she’s sexier than ever. While I wake up early Saturday mornings, to follow live tweets about a visit from Rotherham, or a trip to Huddersfield. #LifeAfterRelegation

Having spilled my feelings and bitterness to you, here are the five things we learned from a thrilling opening weekend to the 2016/17 Premier League season.

1) Conte figured out how to sell soccer to Americans
It didn’t work when Will Ferrell and Mike Ditka tried it in the highly underrated cult classic Kicking & Screaming. But 4-2-4 is the formation that continually teases the audience “there’s going to be a goal here!” Antonio Conte got his winner courtesy of a hungry, and mildly less petulant, Diego Costa.

Chelsea very much look like a team prepared to wear down their opponents over the course of a match, and pounce when the time is right. How Italian of them. They won’t win matches by many goals, but they will win many matches.

Watching Eden Hazard and Willian come off in a 1-1 game must have had most Chelsea fans thinking, “oh God. This guy’s just happy to win one point on his debut!” But all three subs looked inspired and really upped the pressure on West Ham‘s tired defense. I didn’t think we’d ever see Victor Moses in a Chelsea shirt again. He didn’t look half bad! And I’m talking about his play! Those Chelsea tops are awful.

Chelsea probably could have been more creative. Despite James Collins‘ fine equaliser, West Ham really didn’t seem up for it Monday night. Conte’s side would have had the opportunity to create more chances with Cesc Fabregas on the pitch instead of one of either N’Golo Kanté or Nemanja Matic.

Lucky for Conte, he’s got about 55 more matches to play around with things.

2) Man United have got their swagger back
We knew Manchester United would be a different side with José Mourinho running the show. And while it was just the season opener away to Bournemouth, it was clear to see that United have this aura about them that they haven’t had since winning the title three years ago. Scary to think what they’ll look like once Paul Pogba reintegrates himself back in to the team.

You can already see Zlatan Ibrahimovic‘s confidence wearing off on his teammates. In two matches now, they’ve played with a composure that was rarely noticeable under LVG.  Wayne Rooney wasn’t all that impressive, but he’s certainly been worse and if he gets his name on the scoresheet every time he plays a match like that, he’s going to keep his place in the side.

3) Wenger will panic buy on Deadline Day
Have we unknowingly stumbled on to a near decade-long conspiracy where Arsene Wenger leaves all his business until the last few days of the window so that Sky Sports can keep “Jim White Day” going?

I can’t remember the last time I didn’t read or hear “injury crisis” and “Arsenal” in the same sentence.  There’s a great game show brewing at The Emirates: “who’s this guy you’ve never heard of before in Wenger’s XI?” That game works for reading transfer rumours as well.

Buckle up and prepare to read endless unknowns from the lesser televised regions of Europe linked with a move to the Gunners. Or, maybe Wenger will just wait for captain Per Mertesacker to return from injury in five months.

Certainly Rob Holding deserved a better debut than that? Word was Francis Coquelin had been training next to Callum Chambers in pre-season. That could be the centreback pairing when Arsenal visit champions Leicester in Saturday’s late kickoff.

4) Children’s crests are SO in right now
Not to enrage all you Manchester City and West Ham supporters. You’re an incredibly passionate and loyal bunch. Your teams have real history and tradition. So why on earth have the badges become so simplistic they look like they were designed on Snapchat?

5) Hull will not be relegated on zero points
Fueled by the last placed predictions of everyone from Hull to Hong Kong, and the presence of the champions in the first Premier League match of this new season, the Tigers showed us that magic isn’t reserved simply for Leicester. I thought a Leicester win was the lock of the weekend. Clearly I know nothing. And Claudio Ranieri meant it when he said, “staying up is the focus.”

NOTABLE MENTION
Pep Guardiola doesn’t have the Hart for Shrewsbury Joe. Really don’t know why he would wait til the start of the season to send that message to Hart, everyone watching, and most importantly, clubs with a goalkeeper to sell. Willy Caballero will do the trick for now. He genuinely appears to relish the role of sweeper keeper. But expect a bigger name to walk in to The Etihad before the window closes.

Jürgen Klopp didn’t realise he hired his doppelgänger when he convinced fitness coach Andreas Kornmayer to trade Bavaria for Merseyside. Or, more likely, Klopp knew that having Kornmayer around would help protect him from angry players and fans when these three-a-day training sessions put half the squad on the disabled list. One of them must drive a Saab still, right? #ArchitectsGlasses

Watch out Gary Lineker: Andy Townsend is coming for you mate! And he didn’t even need to take his clothes off.

I really enjoyed the Premier League Productions ‘Matchday Live’ half-time and post-match set up with just Townsend and former Canadian Owen Hargreaves standing in a poshy looking footballer’s cottage, speaking about Chelsea and West Ham like a couple of pros just bantering All that was missing was a couple of pints on that monitor/table. Though now that hosts have been replaced from host-worthy analysts, I better re-start the “backup” career plans…

5 Things To Watch For In The Prem On Boxing Day

1) Which Liverpool side will show up for Leicester?
Remember when Jürgen Klopp’s side beat Man City 4-1, at The Etihad last month? Liverpool have won just once in the league since and only thanks to a James Milner penalty against Swansea, the week after. Not exactly the model of consistency.

While LFC have played more inspired football since Rodgers was sacked, they’re still a mess defensively. Which should have Jamie Vardy and Riyadh Mahrez licking their chops as they go to bed Friday night.

2) Can Arsenal avoid a repeat of last year’s New Years Day nightmare?
Last year Arsene Wenger‘s men travelled down to the South Coast with title aspirations, an easy task ahead in the last 16 of the Champions League and an injury crisis threatening to derail it all.

This year, only the Champions League task is different. But Arsenal‘s chance of lifting the Premier League trophy come May has never been better. They can’t afford another 2-0 loss.

3) What’s good for the Guus is good for the gander
It’s a cliche my grandfather often used, and one I haven’t heard in years. It means “justice has been served” or “one got what they deserved.” Roman thought leading his champions to the club’s worst ever league start was enough for Mourinho to lose his job. Chelsea supporters clearly didn’t feel that way.

Saturday Guus Hiddink will step in that Chelsea manager’s box for the first time in six years. But unlike last week when his lot of underachievers played to their potential, The Blues have a competent opponent to deal with. Watford come in with one of the hottest strikers in football at the moment, looking to win five in a row.

You can argue that despite their diabolical start, Mourinho didn’t deserve to be sacked. But is Hiddink the one that can serve justice? If he can’t on Saturday, he may never win the support of the Chelsea faithful.

4) You know what they say about a rainy Boxing Day at Stoke
Winless in six, losers of three in a row, with a fan base quickly beginning to believe a manager they once despised is the only one to lead them back to the promise land. Desperate times Louis. Remember what Mark Hughes’ did to their last visitors from Manchester?

It’s the early kickoff Saturday morning, but there’s enough reason for both United fans and the neutral to wake up for it.

5) How many can Man City put passed Sunderland?
Big Sam knew this job would be one of if not the most difficult he’s had. The schedule makers haven’t made it any easier. After inspiring Chelsea, Sunderland will hope to avoid boosting Man City‘s confidence ahead of their title deciding trip to Leicester on Tuesday. Younes Kaboul‘s hamstring injury has made life even more difficult for the Black Cats. Sergio Agüero has scored just seven times in 11 appearances. Not very good numbers compared to this season’s leaders from swashbuckling super powers Leicester and Watford.

This is exactly the type of match where Citeh prove how dangerous they can be. I don’t like to make predictions, but if you’re the betting type it would seem pretty safe to take the over.

5 Things We Learned From The Prem This Weekend – Dec. 21

I’m sure I’m not the only one that stayed up to watch Sepp Blatter‘s remarkable speech Monday morning? 

Sepp is the only man in the world that can make Donald Trump look good. Kept waiting for him to explain how strongly he feels the Washington Redskins shouldn’t have to change their name. 

1) Arsenal are ready to be champions

Titles aren’t decided before Christmas, I know. But Monday’s win over Man City was monumental. Not only did they take points off their only title threat, Arsenal proved they can beat the big clubs again. Staying healthy and continuing to beat the teams they should be beating week in and week out, will be the key to lifting the Premier League trophy over their heads come May. But what a confidence boost to take in to a busy Christmas period. 

2) Chelsea’s players f^&*ing hated Jose Mourinho
How else can you explain Branislav Ivanovic AND Pedro scoring within the first 13 minutes? You couldn’t have better scripted that match on Saturday. 

Stamford Bridge was one of the most bizarre places on planet Earth for 90 minutes. On the pitch a team that looked competent, let alone confident. With an urgency and an efficiency we haven’t seen since last May. And in the stands, you had a loyal fan base furious with ownership for sacking the man responsible for the worst start to a league season in their club’s history. Good luck with Guus.

3) Manchester United players taking page out of Chelsea’s book to get LVG sacked

We know the fans are unhappy with United‘s style of play recently. Isn’t that far fetched to think the players are as well. While just nine points off the top, United are declining in every aspect, except criticism. 

Norwich hadn’t won there in 26 years. That scoreline flattered United on Saturday. They let the Canaries take the game to them and never let the viewer the impression that they had any intent of winning. Dangerous spot for LVG to be in, and obviously from the ‘speculation gossip’ all weekend, he knows it. 

United visit Stoke on Boxing Day, then host Chelsea and Swansea. If they don’t take six points, hello Jose. 

4) If there was any doubt, Harry Kane is England’s only #9

Tottenham have quietly worked their way in to the Top 4. And after starting the year on an eight game goal drought, Harry Kane has scored 10 goals in his last 10 games. Hard to believe he’s already made 100 appearances for Spurs. He’s scored 47 goals for Tottenham now. His ratio? Nearly identical to Martin Chivers. There’s no need for Mauricio Pochettino to look to anyone else up front. And Roy Hodgson has no reason either. 

5) Odion Ighalo is incapable of staying off the scoresheet
Reminds you of another frontman on a recently promoted team that you expected very little from, doesn’t it? For those of you closely following the NFL this season, Odion Ighalo is the Kansas City Chiefs to Jamie Vardy’s… Perfect Panthers. If you get me, ya get me.

Nobody other than Quique is talking about Ighalo, and we bloody well should be. His 12 goals are a big reason Watford are comfortably in the top half of the table. That and the fact that their game plan is to run their opposition to death. Mamadou Sakho couldn’t keep pace with Ighalo, and Quique’s 4-4-2 works brilliantly with Troy Deeney next to him. Liverpool were never in that match Sunday.

And I’m so happy the Watford faithful got to enjoy that at Vicarage Road. This was their fourth straight league win, eighth of the season now, and against the best opposition they’ve beaten. Watford sit seventh in the table, four points better than Liverpool! Wow. The Golden Boys are fully deserving of the nickname this Christmas.

5 Things We Learned From The Prem This Weekend – Aug. 9

Sure, it feels like last season just ended. And yes if you live in a particularly colder climate like I do, it signals the premature end of summer. But damn it feels good to have Premier League football back. Saturday mornings mean something again.

Petr Cech is not going to win Arsenal the title
I didn’t need to watch Sunday’s nightmare to know that. I was so puzzled by how many people picked Arsenal to end their title drought because of the acquisition of a once world-class keeper. Petr Cech does not deserve to be rotting on Chelsea’s bench. But he is not as sharp as he was three years ago, and certainly not the final piece to make a contender a champion. Gooners got a tough dose of that Sunday morning. Arsene Wenger can blame Arsenal’s “defensive lapses” all he wants. The reality is, he is banking on a declining goalkeeper to build brand new relationships with men in front of him who quite often, don’t know what they’re doing.

Philippe Coutinho will make Liverpool fans forget about Raheem Sterling
The Brasilian’s impact has long been underrated on Merseyside. Liverpool did not deserve anything more than a point from The Britannia. But that moment of brilliance should’ve been worth four. Coutinho is Liverpool’s most important asset, though Brendan Rodgers would love Jordan Ibe to be looked at that way. Perhaps in time. For now, as Liverpool learn to send crosses in for a more than capable frontman, in Christian Benteke, it has to be more than comforting to know that Coutinho can turn the match on it’s head given the right opportunity.

Chelsea will be pushed to repeat
The intensity Swansea showed even before Chelsea went down a man, was inspiring. Jose‘s Blues are going to have to work for every W this season. Signing Asmir Begovic will look like a masterstroke now. Away to Man City Sunday morning, Chelsea will need to put themselves in a better position so they’re not solely relying on the counter to create.

Sergio Romero was not a useless signing
And here I thought Sam Johnstone was going to start the season! Tottenham deserved to take a point away from Old Trafford. But the Argentina #1 denied Spurs the satisfaction, and rewarded LVG for signing him two weeks ago. Anyone other than a 100% committed David de Gea is a step down, but Romero is a very good shot stopper. And that backline is going to allow him to face plenty more than just the four that Tottenham put on target Saturday. But it doesn’t matter, because unlike last year, LVG’s side started with a win. Having said all that, I don’t see how the Dutchman can let the transfer window close without adding another frontman. They can’t possibly expect to compete on multiple fronts with just Wayne Rooney and Memphis Depay. Depay is a winger! Marouane Fellaini has proven he can play up top. But he shouldn’t be relied upon. Go out and do some more useful business Louis. Start by getting bodies in return for de Gea, Valdes and Anders Lindegaard.

Aston Villa might just be alright this season. Who woulda Gestede?
It’s just one match, against a newly promoted side that most expect to go straight back down. But starting a seemingly doomed campaign with three points on the road is the best thing Timmy Sherwood could’ve hoped for. Rudy Gestede will never be Christian Benteke. But having scored 20 headed goals in the last two seasons, his new teammates can at least provide him the same service. Making the transition easy on everyone else.

NOTABLE MENTION
Doesn’t Jose Mourinho have any sympathy for the all bullshit Eva Carneiro has had to deal with touching John Terry and Ashley Cole for all those years! What could any team doctor do to deserve such a public scolding?

It’s remarkable that anyone could make their Premier League debut at the age of 16. But how many kids even dream their first chance would come with 79 minutes playing at The Emirates? Beating Arsenal. The most telling thing about Reece Oxford to me, is how Slaven Bilic described his mental makeup: “If Messi was in front of me, I’d be more fazed than Reece.” Out of the Europa League. Start the league with an away win. Slaven can do no wrong in the East End!

Crystal Palace benefited from referee Simon Hooper‘s decision to rule out Cameron Jerome‘s goal, but Norwich still would’ve fallen on Saturday. The gulf in class on display was massive. And to think Alan Pardew looked insane for taking the job at a club that had gone through managers quicker than Toronto FC. And I still can not believe Yohan Cabaye plays his football at Selhurst Park. Soccer has changed.

Gabby Obertan is still playing Premier League football. Wow.

Southampton could play in MLS with that away kit. I actually quite like it, and The Saints of course are always entertaining to watch. Might regret not adding Graz Pelle to my fantasy team. C’mon Saido Berahino! 

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Monday Morning Thoughts – Aug. 3

Since I took the weekend off, let me get a few thoughts out of the way first:

1) How the hell is it already August?

2) Holy shit Ronda Rousey is good at her job! Like most, I didn’t know a thing about Bethe Correia before their UFC 190 fight. But every time I saw her she reminded of the crazy woman depicted in any movie set in a female prison. Ever. The Mike Tyson comparisons are fully deserved. Rousey is the face of MMA. At it’s height six years, who would have ever guessed Dana White would need a woman to sustain UFC’s success?

3) Thanks a lot David Price for raising the price of popcorn at Rogers Centre by $3 a bag with your ringing endorsement.

MLB
Hands up if you would like to see the Blue Jays play the Royals in October? Tempers boiled over in yesterday’s series finale as the Royals recognized their moment as the new “unexpectedly good” guys on the block, may be over after one magical season. Umpire Jim Wolf let the ballgame get out of hand. Josh Donaldson was right to be as upset as he was. Edinson Volquez thrives on getting under the skin of his opposition. And Ned Yost loves players who do that. Alex Anthopoulos did everything he could last week to make the Blue Jays a postseason team. They just took three of four off the team that was one win away from winning the World Series last October. Looking good Jays. On to the Twins. I fear I’ll have to line up at Rogers Centre by 11am to get a Russell Martin bobblehead today. Is any mass produced sports collectible worth that?

I think the New York Mets may just win the NL East. They’re playing for each other. There’s a real sense of unity with that team right now. And all the pressure is on the Washington Nationals.

If only Andrew McCutchen had $1 million for every time he got hit with a pitch.

The Angels slide is very entertaining. Swept in the Freeway Series, the Halos have lost six in a row and nine of 10. Is there any one that wouldn’t rather see the Houston Astros win the AL West? Far too many times Mike Scioscia‘s team was just given division titles. Never expected it would be the Astros to make em earn it.

SOCCER
Did you think Jose Mourinho was going to congratulate Arsene Wenger for beating him for the first time in 14 tries? Jose’s response was typically Jose. Snubbing the handshake. Downplaying the Community Shield’s relevance to the new season. But throwing the loser’s medal in to the stands, is a new low. Even for Jose. Having said all that, a part of me thinks Mourinho really does see Arsenal as a threat this season. The Gunners have improved in areas they needed to. Winning the FA Cup again was a huge confidence boost for the squad. This is not the same team that failed to contend last season. I can not believe the Premier League starts this weekend. I’m not ready.

Is Angel Di Maria really just 75% of the player he was when Manchester United bought him?  Buying him for less than £60 million last season, even though a British record, was seen as a coup for United. After one less than fruitful season they turn around and sell him for less than £45 million? Something doesn’t make sense here. When PSG cruise through the group stage and are even money favourites to win the Champions League at Christmas, LVG will never hear the end of it. If he’s even still there.

I lost so much respect for Christian Benteke. No not because he left Aston Villa. And not because of what he wrote in his latest Liverpool loving Instagram post. Simply because of that hashtag. No self respecting adult should ever use the #NowWatchMeNaeNae

Did you know Atletico Madrid were so beloved in China? Neither did I.

NFL
I don’t think Chip Kelly is a racist. But I do think there’s truth to what Brandon Boykin and LeSean McCoy are saying. Is it shocking to think that a 51 year-old guy from New Hampshire that only coached college until two years ago struggles to relate to his NFL players? Most people on this planet can’t actually relate to pro athletes. Kelly said Boykin was blindsided and disappointed about being traded. Boykin felt ignored by his head coach. The real problem is that Kelly isn’t Andy Reid. That sentence right there explains that entire Eagles locker room.

Completely unrelated: was McCoy at Caribana this weekend?

If Richie Incognito is the best option Rex Ryan has to play at left guard, than Incognito deserves to start. If Ryan brought Incognito in to his new environment because he believes the 320-pounder deserves a second chance, than Ryan is an idiot.

Russell Wilson “Carmelo Anthony‘d” the Seahawks. They had to give them that money. Should he be the second highest-paid quarterback in the NFL? No. Could they have gotten to two Super Bowl’s without him? Possibly. But, part of the reason the Seahawks have been so competitive is that they did not have to pay a QB a fortune. The rest of the team will feel all that money going to one position. Could be a really rough start to the season for Wilson. His offensive line is half as good as it was last year and everyone will be looking for him to fail, and blame it on the money. People just jealous that he’s dating Ciara. I know I am.

OLYMPICS
It’s about time the IOC starts testing Rio’s disease infested waters. Let’s be honest, the Brasilian government will throw gallons of chlorine and masking agents into the water a month before and tell everyone the coast is fine. Then a tuna will walk out of the water on two legs and eat Brian Williams.

3 Things We Learned From The Prem This Weekend – May 10

I spent Saturday in Ottawa with the Bytown Boys Supporters Club (run by a few classy Villans) and Stony Monday Riot in section W, watching their beloved Ottawa Fury FC battle the Thomas Rongen led Tampa Bay Rowdies. It was one of the best roadtrips I’ve ever taken.

The scoreless draw left a bit to be desired, but the atmosphere was exactly what I wanted. Just because it’s not Champions League quality, doesn’t mean it’s not worth supporting. The only way the sport gets bigger in this country is by supporting what we have in our own backyards. I’d make the trip up again in a heartbeat.

Manchester City take great pleasure in inflicting misery on the miserable
Sunday’s loss at Man City was the perfect explanation of why QPR are going down, again. Their defense wasn’t just shambolic, but absolutely pathetic. Couldn’t even spot an ounce of professional pride. They’ve taken the pitch for weeks accepting their demoted fate and on their latest failure proved just how few players care. They don’t intend to be around next season and know that new opportunities will come solely based on their previous accolades, so what’s the point?

My brother (actual QPR fan. I’m sure you bet they didn’t exist) is in bits because he knows with the financial ruin ahead of them, he may never get to see them on TV again, let alone back in the Premier League.

If Burnley can’t have Premier League football, you can’t either!
It must be some consolation for Burnley fans that as their relegation fate was sealed, they’ve pulled Hull into the mess with them.

That might have been the worst match of the season. Hull made 21 attempts on goal. They hit the target three times. That just sounds like a side that deserves to go down. Add the fact that in home games versus Newcastle, Leicester, Burnley and Sunderland, they took just one point and scored zero goals, and you don’t even need to see Steve Bruce‘s Tigers play to know they’re done.

Sunderland don’t care that you want them to be relegated
Sunderland dug in at Goodison Saturday morning, and were rewarded with a crucial three points. That was just Everton‘s first loss in 12. More impressive, Dick Advocaat has won three of his six matches in charge. It’s not often you can win a match managing less than 30% possession. But when Jermain Defoe is scoring goals off his arms, it’s gonna be a good day.

NOTABLE MENTION
John Terry bathes in the fountain of youth. He’s had a truly remarkable season for Chelsea and there’s not one person on the planet that can say they saw this coming. He’s now the highest scoring defender in Premier League history. What he lacks in pace, he makes up for with his placement and ability to read the game. Without Psycho Bob (David Luiz) next to him, he’s playing as well as he did when Jose first showed up at The Bridge. If I were I Chelsea fan, I’d be terrified at the very thought of ‘Life after JT.’

At this rate, Leicester will be striving for European football next season. On this form, might be Champions League. Their late surge has been remarkable. After producing just 15 goals in 23 matches, they’ve bagged 17 in 8. I’d vote Nigel Pearson manager of the year. His entertainment level alone puts him over the top.

Timmy Sherwood not only knows how to get the best out of his frontmen, he can even get Tom Cleverley to score! Might just get Grandpa Roy to pick up the phone. Would easily get 10,000 signatures from Villa Park alone saying he deserves to be in the squad. Just keeping Kevin Nolan off the scoresheet Saturday was a true success for Villa. The way Sherwood has had Villa playing since taking over from Paul Lambert, they really do  have a chance to win the FA Cup.

I’ll be away for a couple of weeks so my posts will be a bit more sporadic than I’d like, but check back often.

5 Things We Learned From The Prem This Weekend – Apr. 26

Arsene Wenger will never beat Jose Mourinho

Not because he’s not tactically sharp. Not because he doesn’t have the best players. Wenger will never beat Jose simply because Mourinho will kill the game before he gives Wenger’s team a chance. Jose doesn’t even respect Wenger enough to start a striker!

The frustrating part for the neutral is watching Chelsea assemble an expensive squad with some of the very best players around, and then suffocate their opponents, happy to settle for away draws. Why not just build a team full of guys that once played for Stoke, or TFC for that matter if you never intend to unleash the quality you have available?

Obviously I’m being a bitter cynic. Chelsea are the second highest scoring team in the Prem, and put together a string of very entertaining matches this season. But Jose’s critics are right. When Chelsea go up against talented opposition, they’re boring as all hell.

Manchester United are incapable of playing well against Everton

Who was that team wearing red yesterday? Certainly didn’t look like the United we’ve gotten used to watching over the last two months. Everton have been one of the biggest disappointments of the season. But United made them look like Champions League semifinalists.

Expect a few Champions League clubs to put in phone calls for Ross Barkley and John Stones this summer. Last month we were talking about Everton being sucked in to the relegation battle, but thanks to this six match unbeaten run, they’re likely to finish in the top half of the table.

Timmy Sherwood’s Villa are a good watch

Football isn’t fair. Aston Villa deserved something from their trip to The Etihad, and that’s not my fandom talking.

After gifting Citeh the opening goal, Villa bossed the first half. They controlled possession and created chances. The issue was Tom Cleverley tended to get in the way and his efforts on goal often leave a lot to be desired. Though his goal made up for a couple of his previous poor attempts.

Carlos Sanchez scored a goal that only South American players can. It was a thing of beauty. If only Christian Benteke hadn’t been called offside 38 previous times, his most important run of the match would have gone in his favour and likely resulted in a game winning penalty. It was an incredibly close call, but having been offside all afternoon, the official had no choice but to put his flag up. Shrewsbury Joe wins again! Of course City found a winner in the end. The roller coaster of emotions one in love with The Villa goes through, is unlike anything else.

The universe wants QPR to be relegated again

How else can you explain how Charlie Austin has a penalty stopped? Time and time again Chris Ramsey‘s side have been forced to settle for draws when they probably deserved all three points. That might have been the final nail in the coffin. Hull’s miracle win at Palace certainly didn’t help their cause.

Leicester don’t want to satisfy everyone that picked them to go down

What a fight from The Foxes to win at Turf Moor on Saturday. This relegation battle just got real. Leicester are home to Chelsea on Wednesday, but after that Newcastle and Southampton pay a visit, before they go to Sunderland and finish the season at home to QPR. Another six if not seven points are very likely.

3 Things To Watch In The Prem This Weekend – Week 32

Arsenal’s unstoppable form
The Gunners have the chance to do something this weekend that no Premier League club has this season: win eight games in a row.

Quite the feat considering the entire Western World, including myself, called for Wenger to walk away after Arsenal’s leg one debacle against Monaco. Arsenal have the same record after 31 matches as they did last season. If only they had played like this before Christmas.

Injuries have taken their toll, as they always do with this squad, but Arsenal look like legit second place finishers. One that could actually challenge for a title next season. Hmm, why do I feel like I’ve said that before?

Tim Sherwood’s return to White Hart Lane
Villa’s 3-3 draw with QPR on Tuesday was one of the best advertisement’s for the Premier League I’ve seen in years. Often times those “do-or-die” relegation battles are treated like cup finals. Stagnant and slow as neither side wants to risk opening themselves up. Being best mates, Tim Sherwood and Chris Ramsey put (arguably) their most attacking sides out there and said, “‘ave a go then, boys!”

Given his personality, and the hat-trick that approach got out of Christian Benteke, I wonder if Timmy tries it again on Saturday. It could be far more costly than it turned out to be against QPR. Villa can’t afford to drop any more points. Man City is next on the fixture list. And we all know Villa are capable of conceding three far easier than they could create three.

Given their recent form, a draw is a real possibility. And as far as “sticking it to [his] old club” goes, that would be good enough.

That Manchester derby thing
Who would’ve thought that it would be United likely to finish in the top 3 at the expense of City?

While City have struggled away from home and against some of the poorest clubs, United continue to rack up results and show steady improvement. Even though some of their biggest investments, particularly Falcao, have failed to contribute. Yaya Toure and David Silva made City the best midfield in the Premier League last season. Lately the three-headed monster of Michael Carrick, Ander Herrera and Marouane Fellaini have catapulted United into the race for second place.

We say it every year before these two meet: “this derby will be won in midfield!” If that’s true, bet the farm on United.

3 Things We Learned From The Prem This Weekend – Mar. 22

Juan Mata is the right winger your club wish they had
It’s funny really, because Manchester United only figured that out last week. Coincidence that United’s two best matches came with Mata thriving in his most lethal position? Absolutely not.

That spectacular goal is even more spectacular because he scored it in THAT match, against United’s original “biggest rival”. No one can criticise his £37m price-tag again! Well, for at least 18 months.

How on earth Mata ever went from being Chelsea’s best player to an unwanted flop is beyond me. That partnership with Ander Herrera has reinvigorated the Spaniard and in turn, United.

The Red Devils beat the Reds with creativity. I haven’t been able to write that about any United win in three years!

Fourth place is United’s, if they want it. They just have to continue to put their best players in the best possible situations to succeed. They did on Sunday.

Steven Gerrard will be great in MLS
I would’ve predicted 99 things that could’ve happened in Liverpool’s visit from United before thinking that Stevie G might channel his inner Gennaro Gattuso and get sent off in less than thirty seconds.

The Telegraph ran the headline today “The time is right for Steven Gerrard to say goodbye.”

Six months ago we would’ve dismissed it as an opinion piece, likely written by a Toffees sympathizer. After seeing his decline this season and the shock that even Gerrard can lose his head in a big match, it’s hard to argue that claim.

In Liverpool’s biggest game of the season, Gerrard started on the bench. With his team lacking structure and discipline, he starts the second half. Only to show that his frustration and anxiety is a lethal cocktail that delivers a complete lack of discipline and composure.

Gerrard is not the player he once was. And that’s ok. But for as much of a legend as he is at Anfield, his time is up as a player. He can return one day projected as a Messiah Manager. But after a few successful years in MLS, where he plays in front of sold out stadiums, and mentors the very best young talent the LA Galaxy recruit from Central American countries.

Dick Advocaat is the new Steve Bruce
Because watching him vigorously flail his arms about, with blood vessels popping out of his neck and forehead, makes you fear for his health.

I know Aaliyah said it years ago, “age ain’t nothing but a number.” But at 67, wouldn’t ‘Dickie The Dutchie’ want to be doing something else with his time? I guess not. And really, I applaud him for that.

Advocaat wanted to have a Premier League club on his resume before the curtain falls on his career. It’s just unfortunate that a club a mere 9 games from relegation is the only one to give him that opportunity.

Anyone expecting him to turn Sunderland into a free flowing, entertaining side to watch – like his UEFA Cup winning Zenit side – is ridiculous. Sunderland are more likely to kick and smash their way down to the Championship, similarly to the way some Rangers supporters destroyed the city of Manchester the night Advocaat’s Zenit won their only European trophy. But at least they’ll be worth talking about now.

Good luck Dick. God knows you need it.

Premier League matchweek 12 – Three Things to Watch

Rejoice. The international break is over.

Players have returned to their clubs meaning doubt and cynicism can return to our conversations. Unless you’re Southampton, then everything is just peachy because every win from here on out is a bonus.

Here are three things to watch for this weekend.

Arsenal 8-2 Manchester United
Stranger things have happened. Now, plenty would have to happen to see a final scoreline like that. We’re not going to get it, but I know I’ve simultaneously hooked and pissed off all of you United fans reading this.

Remember at the start of the season when Louis Van Gaal boldly said “judge me in three months”? I hope he doesn’t look at a calendar this week, otherwise he might not voluntarily show up for work again.

Regardless of how many they win by, I can’t see how Arsenal lose on Saturday. United could field a squad with their injured list. That’s funny. Because they couldn’t. Point is, they haven’t hit top form even with their shiny new toys. I can’t see how they could without them.

Arsenal get one back. Olivier Giroud is three or four weeks ahead of schedule. Wenger would be mad to start him.

a) Because a normal human body should not recover from a broken leg 21 to 28 days ahead of time and b) because Danny Welbeck has been stellar and doesn’t deserve to be relegated to the wing just yet.

If Ryan Giggs doesn’t suit up to play I’m going to freak out.

How the Chelsea faithful treat Jose Mourinho
“Playing here is like playing in an empty stadium.” – Jose Mourinho. November 1st.

Saturday’s visit from West Brom will be the first match since The Special One basically called Stamford Bridge the Air Canada Centre.

Considering the average match ticket is north of £55 there’s actually plenty of reason to mention the two in the same sentence. However, Jose fails to acknowledge that while his teams can be incredibly successful, they’re not always the most entertaining. The bottom line is when someone is paying to attend a “Premier League Show” in person, they do so with the desire to be entertained.

Wouldn’t it be nice to see Chelsea fans treat Mourinho like Steve Kean or Rafa just for a match?

The ratings Monday Night Football gets this week
No second place team is less sexy for a prime time kickoff than Southampton.

That isn’t fair because their play is tantalizing. Still, there’s a good chance this match won’t match the ratings of 7 minutes of Judge Judy on any Monday afternoon.

Did I mention they visit Aston Villa? Make it 6 minutes.